With all of the latest happenings in my life, I stopped writing about all of my crazy dates! So here goes...
When I started in my new job, I started an account at an online dating website. At first, it was fun and helped to pass the time, but after a while, I realized it wasn't what I needed. At one point, I had a young man, Ben, send me a message on the dating website. I checked out his profile and read the message, and I was not impressed. He just wasn't my type, and honestly I didn't find him very attractive at all. I ignored his message and never responded. A few days later he messaged me on Facebook. Really? How the hell did he even find me?? I was so confused... I ignored this message just like I ignored the last one. A few days later, Ben sent me another message on the sating website. Clearly this guys DOES NOT get it. I finally wrote back... one and two word answers to his questions. He ate it up. The messages kept flooding in, and my uninterested responses kept getting sent back.
Eventually on a Friday night, I asked him where he worked. I didn't check my email at all over the weekend. First thing Monday morning, I was on the phone with a vendor through work, and I started scanning over our massive internal phone list. My eyes fell straight on Ben's name. I nearly had a heart attack while on the phone with the vendor. I quickly hung up and frantically opened my email. Sure enough! He had written back and talked about how he worked in IT at the same company as myself. My jaw dropped. Is this possible? Clearly this guy is messing with me. He had to have known that I worked here. He had to have been checking up on me. I panicked. Then it dawned on me! Use the oldest excuse in the book! "Sorry, I don't date people I work with." Totally lame and I have never followed that policy (oops), but he didn't have to know that. I wrote back and explained that we work together (small world!) and what my personal work policy consists of. Take that one Mr. IT guy! He responded with "Well, I don't like your personal policy, but since you are new here, why don't we go to dinner as friends?" Damn. He got me. I reluctantly agreed.
We met up for dinner at a Mexican restaurant not far from my place. Conversation was super awkward because he kept asking me questions, but wouldn't really respond to any of mine. A very one-sided conversation to say the least. At one point, I asked him about his family. Did he have siblings? How many? What did his parents do for a living? Did he see his family very often? "Yeah I see them a lot. Especially my sister because she has a son," he said. "Aww that's cute! Is your sister older or younger than you?" "Oh she's younger, a lot younger," he responded. My head is quickly calculating all of the mental math at this point. Something wasn't making sense. "So did she have him at a really young age?" "Oh yeah. She got raped in high school," he said without even flinching. I was shocked and I'm pretty sure my jaw hit the table! WTF? Who even says that??? I couldn't find a quick way to respond or save the conversation. Epic fail.
Not long after that, I said it was time for me to leave and I excused myself from the table. He followed right on my tail and said he'd walk me to my car. I told him it wasn't necessary. He was adamant. I gave up because I was in no mood to argue with him. I begrudgingly headed to the car. Once we were there, I unlocked the door and quickly made a move to get in the car. He grabbed me and attempted to kiss me. I balked pushed away and locked myself in the car. I don't even remember saying "thank you" for dinner or anything. Shame on me. I drove away fuming. He knew how I felt and he knew my policy. Instead, he tried to "change my mind". Jackass.
For several days following our "date", Ben constantly texted me. It was nonstop. I didn't respond to a majority of the texts, and I finally stopped responding altogether. That sent him over the edge. The texts became aggressive and controlling. It was weird. I even told quite a few people about him at work, just in case I went missing. One night, I was home alone as per usual, and another text from him came through. I blew it off for a while and then finally read it. "I'm really upset with you. I had all kinds of great plans for us. Lots of things for us to try and lots of places for us to go together. I can't believe you are doing this to me." I stood in shock. Really? Crazy weirdo. I deleted the message and headed to bed. A little while later, another text came through. This one was a little more intense and a lot creepier. "That's it. I'm so disappointed in you. I had all kinds of great things for us! I even had all of the accommodations and reservations done for us to spend our one year anniversary in Hawaii together!" Holy lord. I was speechless. Crazy mother effer. I kept this message, just in case. I didn't respond at all. He left me alone for a while, but he eventually made an attempt to talk to me again. I told him that he was making me uncomfortable and that I didn't want to talk to him anymore. He seemed to get the hint. I haven't had any problems with him since then, but "Captain Creepy" as we affectionately call him in the workplace, is well known and oftentimes the center of some sarcastic quips. I now know that I need to be a little more stringent in my dating preferences. Learning to say "NO" is a must!
